Oct. 19, 2016. Ah, yes, the beginning of the end of the world–I mean, uh, the last presidential debate, of course. Anyway, to hopefully no one’s surprise, Trump was chock-full of his hand-waving, lip-puckering, nose-sniffling outlandish antics, and Twitter nearly exploded. This time, however, I must say, Twitter outdid itself by coming up with #TrumpBookReport because I don’t think Mr. Tonsoni and I have ever laughed so hard in our lives.

Seriously though, if you’re literally sitting in the corner of your bedroom crying because of the impending implosion of the planet, please enjoy these cute ‘lil tweets that are sure to bring a smile to your face.

“Juliet. Such a nasty woman. She made Romeo kill himself. And believe me he could’ve done better. Look at her.” #TrumpBookReport

“Noah was so bad. I’ll deport the animals. All the animals love me. I’ll build a beautiful ark. God will pay for the ark.”

#TrumpBookReport

“It took Low Energy Harry Potter 7 books to defeat Voldemort. Sad! I would’ve beat him in the first book!”

#TrumpBookReport

“I think little red riding hood was asking for it. Why else would she be walking through the woods alone? I’m with wolf.”

#TrumpBookReport

“When District 12 sends its people, they’re not sending their best. They’re sending Katniss Everdeen. What a nasty woman.”

#TrumpBookReport

“Uncle Tom’s Cabin, worst cabin in the inner city. Terrible schools. Nasty women & bad hombres everywhere.”

#TrumpBookReport

“We’re going to catch so much rye, you won’t believe it. We’re bringing those rye catching jobs to America.”

#TrumpBookReport

“Too many mice, not enough men. I’ll change that, believe me.”

#TrumpBookReport

“Gatsby? He says he was great. I don’t know. People are saying maybe not so great. I will make Gatsby great again!”

#TrumpBookReport

“I’ve never had a problem finding Waldo, Never. Ask anyone. I always find Waldo.”

#TrumpBookReport

“Man in Yellow Hat? Total loser. Couldn’t even control a monkey. By the way, that monkey? Illegal immigrant. Bad hombre.”

#TrumpBookReport

The Hunger Games are rigged, folks. Everyone knows Katniss won because she played the woman card. Nasty woman. Very rigged.

#TrumpBookReport

“50 Shades of Grey? Boring! Grey’s a weak color. Very weak. Lightweight. Gold’s better. I have a lot of gold. I’m very rich.”

#TrumpBookReport

Are you on the floor dying right now? If not, I’m sincerely concerned about your mental function, but do not fear, for I am a trained medical professional. (I’ve got 12 seasons of Grey’s Anatomy under my belt.) You’ve either got a bad case of old fart disease, or you’ve been watching this election turmoil for far too long. I’m going to prescribe you a big dose of fresh air. Get out from in front of the television, and enjoy nature. I promise, the world will still be spinning in a few days. I hope, at least.